Covid 19: My silent invader
It was bound to happen at some point. Especially when my husband and I agreed that he should take the jobs which required travel. Back to back travel across the country during the 2020/21 holiday season, and come mid January 2021; Covid-19 had found its way into our home. But it wasn’t so cut and clean as that. It has been a whirlwind of knowing my own self; trusting and observing what my body was telling me thru the process. This is my covid-19 story.
My covid-19 story starts with my partner, Glen. For him, the start of symptoms were obvious. He had been traveling, and although he had taken every precaution during travel. I suspect the long work hours, the changing time zones, and the change of diet stressed his immune system. Let’s be clear; these changes are mostly unavaoidable when working in a high paced and demanding environment.
He started feeling achey and sore a few days after his plane landed back in Salt Lake. It was subtle, and reasonable that he was achey from the daily exercise routine he was immersed. All the aches and pains were limited to those joints he used most for climbing and skiing. Within 24 hours of those aches, Glen erupted into fever, chills, more intense aches and was coughing. We knew that at long last, after almost a year of precautions, covid was upon us. He tested positive the next day.
Glen’s symptoms would go on for 14 days. During this time I was both isolated from him and similarly exposed. We did our best to keep the viral load quarantined, but certainly…I had already been exposed in those initial days of no symptoms followed by the first day of abrupt symptoms. He is, fortunately doing well and reports that his experience was 10 days of the worse flu like body aches, cough, and feeling of being sick with the flu.
But, this isn’t entiretly about my husband’s experience…I’d like to share with you my experience and why this virus is so tricky.
It turns out, I had Covid-19 at the same time. Although I hardely knew it because I was fairly asymptomatic. The night that I picked up on Glen’s cough we were in a condo, starting a ski stay-cation in the Wasatch. That first night was the night that he erupted into aches and pains. The second night he had an obvious growing cough. When Glen tested postive, I immediately closed down my work schedule, started taking the TCM formulations I had stocked my office with and went into quarantine. I would test negative for covid-19 a 5 days after exposure. And then negative again 1 week later.
Because we had the condo, I isolated there while Glen went home to quarantine, just 30 minutes away. In isolation at the condo, I witnessed my own venture in dealing with a virus that I felt I likely had, even though I had tested negative. I skied one of the days I was there, keeping sure to stay away from all people, to not share a chair lift, certainly I avoided the enclosed gondola all together. At the end of that 4 hour ski day, I went back to the condo and sat in our personal condo hottub; a place I had treasured during my days of ski-cation isolation. Later that evening I noticed that I was very achey, especially at the base of my skull; in the same place that my head would sit at level of the bubbling waters of the hottub. It seemed reasonable that was why my neck was tense…that, and it had been a very stressfull week.
That same night, things got interesting. I was concerned going to bed that I may have covid and my time for leaving was just the next day; I needed to get everything out of the condo and ski locker without anyone being around. What if I had it? I woke in the middle of the night to a dream which clearly in my mind said, ‘Yes, this virus is in you. You are fighting the virus off.’ In this dream there was a tree, a softwood like a pine or spruce. It was large and grandiose. It was on fire, blazing hot. This large tree was surrounded by shadow beings ritualisticly dancing around the hot and blazing tree; beyond them lay a vast forest. When I woke. I knew. My body, along with the help of the medicanal plant allies I had employed, were at that moment containing the novel coronavirus within me.
In the morning, uner the shadows of dawn, at 4am, I gathered both mine and Glen’s belongings and departed for home without seeing a soul.
When I arrived at home, Glen was in full throws of his viral symptoms. Again, testing negative, I slept on the couch and in continued isolation; as much as one can within 1000 square feet; a shared kitchen and bathroom. I was tired and stressed. And this too, was reasonable. Glen felt awful and coming home to self-isolation in quarantine was as stressful as it can get in a relationship. I was exhausted by the experience. I slept about 12 hours every night. During the day I worked on a puzzle, ate the soup I had made, checked in with Glen, drank a lot of tea and warm fluids, continued to take my TCM herbal formulations and watched way too much netflix programming for a single lifetime. I repeated this routine for a solid weak, every night fatigued and sleeping for about 12 hours.
After 10 days of Glen’s positive test his symptoms were greatly reduced and we were prepparing for ending our quarantine. Emotionally we were both roughed up and frazzled by the whole ordeal. Knowing his fever had broken and he was in alignment with what the health department recomended for ending quarantine; I stopped taking the TCM herbs I had put myself on almost 2 weeks prior. Many of these herbs I had been using intermittently for over a year now to boost my immune system and fend off contagious pathogens. That weekend, within 24-48 hours of going off the TCM herbs, I noticed I had allergies alike that of when I was a child. Within 72 hours I noticed a splotchy dime size rash on my chest. I decided I needed a few more days of personal isolation before going back to work. I had the house deep cleaned, down to the duct work. My allergies were much better, but still there a little.
Reintegration into work and exercise took about a month to feel fluid and normal. For the month of February I was easily fatigued by exertion and felt I couldnt take a deep breath. My allergies continued and I often felt asthmatic with exertion. I had obvious dark circles under my eyes. And my anxiety had greatly intensified; I felt I couldn’t handle too many stressors in a day. Coming out of quarantine, I felt like a different and diminished version of myself and couldn’t shake that even though I tested negative twice; I had had covid19. I consulted with a doctor and they ordered an antibody test for 21 days after my known exposure. Sure enough, on a range of 1-7, my covid anitbody test registered at a 3.5. False positive you may think? As I finally recant this expeience, it is now May 2021, I have had 2 more positive antibody tests taken for the months of April and May.
So what now? Am I a covid long hauler? I still don’t know in all honesty. I definitely have recovered. But my body has gone thru somewhat of a time warp in the past few months. See, when I was a kid I had allergies, I had asthma, and I had digestive problems, and anxiety. And all of that has come back to some degree after covid19. My anxiety is the most notable change. I have been more anxious than I have ever been in my life (or did I just notice it more?). I had mild cramping related to my menstration; not normal. The allergies decreased over time and instead I noticed digestive upset. Since January I’ve been irregular, loose, gasey, had strong smelling stools, and the occaional intestinal cramp. TMI? Not really! See, this tells me that my body is indeed moving something thru and out. Especially since digestion and all other symptoms are improving and becoming more normalized this past month.
I believe that I am fully on the mend. And here’s what I’ve determined about this virus. It’s here to tell us something. Not only about our own health, but about our collective health. I’m amazed at how quickly one factor can change our entire worlds. I’m praying this change is for the better and my heart goes out to all those who lost something or someone precious to them in this collective experience.